26
Jul
09

An analysis of “Riding the Rails”; Matt’s first post

Matt started off the day with an incredibly long night, culminating in his first attempt at a post. If you haven’t caught it yet, check it out. He later followed up with an elaboration on his thoughts, but I think the elaboration missed a lot of his first points. I will now go in to a review of his original post: Riding the Rails.

It would appear that Matt has an understanding of what “transit” is which varies wildly different than the common term. For Matt, transit is but a mere “method of transportation”, used only by “millions of people across the globe” to “get to work, school, or just ride around the newBikeway”. This exclusive New Transit is extremely versitile, being able to get you as far as work and school, but also being legal to ride around the newBikeway, which is a recently initiative of the City, an emerging cult.

In the second part of his essay, Matt goes on to warn us of the dangers of the hot  hotrod, and the ails of gambling at the new casino. He is hopeful that these dangers will be followed up with more meaningful consultation, in particular for those people belonging to  City, and are from Richmond.

Matt hopes that the City in Richmond can follow the track that the City of Calgary took: a massive consultation. He warns us, however, that parents and siblings need to be pulled out of the process prior to any consultative successes. One can only assume this is because the City is a family without hierarchy, and you must give up your former way prior to being adopted in. The City’s 50-year PlanIt process is the plan given by the great Ourfair Costal, the leader of the City. Matt agrees that Ourfair’s plan to densify the City is great for the City overall, yet he remains skeptical of the upcoming medical season of PlanIt dismissing it as neither “nere” nor “ther”, two central tenants of the City way.

But alas, none of the warnings addressed before compare to what comes next. He warns us of a new threat, much more dangerous than the hot  hotrod–that of the Soviet Spy. While the hot  hotrod’s danger came from its hotness, the Soviet spy possesses the power to divert transit into buildings. This is why the Housing Project, a subproject of the Olympic Project was constructed–to find the Spy.

Concern, however, is what we are left with at the end of the day. Matt claims he has found a solution to this problem. The mine o lazy boy chair. He claims to be in possession of one, but he cannot remember his ‘where id’, and hence, cannot tweet it to us. Without the mine o lazy boy, we run the risk of letting the Soviet Spy divert the transit, ultimately undermining Ourfair’s PlanIt, and ending the City as we know them.

We recently found a short film based on Matt’s hypothesis. It can be viewed below.

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